
3. 📈 KPI Roulette: The Art of Constantly Changing Metrics to Confuse Your Board
Ever wondered how to keep your board of directors endlessly guessing—and mildly frustrated—with your startup's performance? Welcome to "KPI Roulette," the satirical CEO playbook on creatively redefining metrics, blending timelines, and presenting numbers so obscurely even you forget what they mean. Master these techniques to make your startup board of directors responsibilities feel more like improv theater than governance—just make sure your D&O insurance for startups is paid up first.